According to one of the on-line dictionaries, strength can be defined as...moralpower,firmness,orcourage. Amanda was a very strong person. Amanda had the ability to strengthen those around her. We've found, through losing her, who among those she left behind are really strong, like Amanda would have wanted them to be.
Amanda married, moved far from home, made a home for her and Cody, alone and sick, while her husband was deployed. That's strength coupled with courage and love. She WOULD NOT allow Cystic Fibrosis to stand in her way, and rarely even let people know she had CF. She hated enabling and refused to be enabled. Again, so strong.
Amanda would be very angry if her family, friends, loved ones stopped living and hid under a rock. It would hurt her to see us give up and not keep living. She would have wanted each of us to get up and go teach, or repair appliances, or go to school, or work at our jobs, or continue to book and shoot weddings. Amanda would want Cody to continue his Navy career. Amanda would want her brothers-in-law, who she loved deeply to continue their pursuits. She would have wanted her nieces and nephews to go on with their educations and to grow up to be productive adults. Strong people were her favorites. She didn't have much time for people who gave up. She fought until the very end.
To grieve the loss of a loved one and to cry is natural and not a sign of weakness. Giving up is. We are all grieving her death and missing her presence, but Amanda will kick our butts when we get to heaven if we wallow in our grief and give up. As hard as it can be at times, we need to be strong. Much of the strength we have, we have because of her. She left us this strength to be part of a lasting legacy in remembrance of her, and to show one minute of doubt and weakness would only serve to diminish that beautiful legacy.
Veronica and I were her mom and dad for 22 years. We knew her BETTER than any one. In her honor, we will use every ounce of strength that Amanda has given us over those 22 years, to continue to be the people she knew we are. Many of our friends have surrounded us with their love and care. They've wrapped us in their prayers, they've flooded us with their sincere condolences. As her closest friends, as her loving parents, her card playing, camping, wedding shooting, drinking buddies, it would be easy and even accepted by those friends for us to show weakness. Amanda would say, unequivocally... BULLSHIT! Were we to give up, I can almost hear her exact words - "Mom, Dad stop it! Get your heads out of your asses and BE STRONG!" We will choose to do just that!
If you were a friend or loved one of Amanda, please honor her memory by being strong. She gave you much of that strength.
It has been two weeks tomorrow since Amanda passed from earth to Heaven. I really miss her. All the relatives and friends that stayed with us during this time have returned to their homes. God knows we still need support and He has provided in only the way God can. Don and Kathy left this morning and shortly after, Cody came by and shared lunch with us. We spent a few wonderful hours together, mostly remembering Amanda. Later on, Paul invited us to dinner at his and Jessica's wonderful home in Kyle, the next town south of here. To top it all off, my lovely cousin in TN messaged me on Facebook to express her love for us. She, if anyone, knows loss, having lost both parents prematurely to a house fire, as well as 3 siblings, who died way too young. I can't even imagine her pain. She'll be sainted one day, and deservedly so.
Veronica and I visited her grave today. Veronica has gone every day since her death. Me, not as much, but it intrigues me to know that other friends have gone to visit her too. Thank you, especially to her whiskey drinking friend. I know she appreciates it and is probably Jonsing for a few shots, considering the lack thereof where she is... ;-)
Yes, I really miss Amanda, but it seems that Amanda has arranged for me/us to be comforted in ways that surpass understanding. She is very persistent, and I know she is in God's ear for us. I also know He is smiling over this child of God with only the smile a father projects regarding a child He loves.
This is the eulogy that was read at Amanda's memorial service. We hope it helps people to know Amanda a little better...
I said so long to a good
friend a week ago today. Not forever, but for a little while. Amanda
was a daughter, a sister, a wife, a confidant, a friend and a child
of God. She was my sister in Christ. Amanda was stronger than most
people and faced adversity with a calm, cool, collective demeanor
than is rare in society today. She did not run from pain, but faced
it head on. She called it “sucking it up”. Most of all, Amanda
was a pistol. There was no stopping her. She did what she was going
to do and most often did it better than most. She would not let
illness stand in her way.
See was diagnosed with
Cystic Fibrosis at 4 months of age. That was a hard pill for me to
swallow. What I knew about CF was from Public Service Announcements
from the 1960's. It is rare that anything makes me weak in the knees,
but finding out that one of my precious daughters had a chronic and
often terminal illness did just that. It blindsided Veronica and me,
but our answer was to fight it to the best of our ability, and reley
on God for the rest of the fight and strength we needed. He provided
as He always does.
Amanda asked me at around
8 years old, how she could live with Jesus forever. I explained the
plan of salvation to her and we prayed the sinners prayer together.
From that day on, Amanda was not only my daughter, she was my sister
in Christ. She had one of the most amazingly strong faiths I've ever
known. In spite of this crushing disease, she never blamed God.
Questioned, maybe. Blame, no way. Amanda LOVED the Lord. This gives
us great comfort as we know we will see her again. I'll never forget
the long talks we've had about Jesus and religion and faith. Her
concern was for others, both temporaly and eternally. She really
cared about others, almost to a fault. Her life and that huge smile
projected her faith in Christ to others.
As a wife, Amanda was a
Proverbs 31 woman. If you'd like to know about what kind of wife she
was, then read the whole chapter.
Verses 30 and 31 sum up
Amanda pretty well. We read:
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a
woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 31Honor her for all
that her hands have done,and let her works bring her praise at the
city gate.
Amanda loved her husband
Cody. In spite of her illness, she always tried to make a nice home,
keep the books and do any task that Cody asked her to. She was
willing to work outside the home to help achieve their goals and
plans. She was an amazing wife.
Amanda loved her family.
She and her sisters could fight and be mad at each other and have
their little tiffs, but if anyone messed with a Warnock, they were
messing with her. She loved her Scottish heritage and proudly wore
her Rampant Lion tatoo from the Royal Flag of Scotland. She is a
proud descendant of The Bruce, King James Stewart, and The Earl of
Argyle and Alexander Hamilton. She wore that heritage on her sleeve,
so to speak.
We were so incredibly
blessed to have Amanda spend the end of last summer and fall with us,
while Cody was deployed. We did so many things together and enjoyed
every minute of it. We were like the Three Musketeers. Amanda told us
of her desire to be a videographer and shoot music videos of country
stars. Her dream was to live in Nashville and be a successful
producer. She shot her first music video this last fall for an up and
coming artist named Zac Young. If Amanda had a goal, she made it a
reality. When most people dream, Amanda just plain did. She revealed
to us during that time, that we were her best friends. We teared up
over such an honor.
Amanda's life was a
beautiful testimony. One of faith and love. One of courage and
strength. We would all do good to follow her example. In a world
hungry for heroes, I didn't have to look far. Amanda WAS my hero.
Many of us are looking for
answers as to why Amanda was taken from us at such a young age. While
I can't give you those answers I can put fourth my theory. In Psalms
139 verses 13 and 14 we read: 13 For you
created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your
works are wonderful, I know that full well.
God knew that Amanda's spirit was larger than life and could only
reside in the body her mother and I pro-created for her for a short
time. James 4:14 tells us: Why, you do not
even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a
mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.
While Amanda was more like a Texas tornado than a mist, the verse
is still true. We should take comfort in knowing that as we approach
a holiday we call Easter, with it's bunnies that lay eggs and other
fables, Amanda is spending Passover and the Feast of First Fruits
with our resurrected Savior in Heaven and she is having the time of
her life with the true vine, the true blood and the true bread that
was given once for us all. We all have the same opportunity that
Amanda has been afforded by acknowledging Jesus as our Lord and
Savior, Amen. May God bless all that hear this message.
Bowling,
sushi, grilled pork chops, chili, jalapeno poppers, whiskey, rum, beer,
margaritas, girl’s night out, snow day drinks, that giant hummer of
hers (!), Kandy and Frida, drunken late night
political/religious/societal/music/dogs conversations, carharts, slip
ons, TEXAS, cosmos, mangos and more Texas. I met Amanda in 2010, but
didn’t really begin to know her until 2012 and if there’s anything that
I’d take back about the two of us it would be that I didn’t try to know
her sooner.
I
still have a bottle of Gentleman’s Jack that I bought for when she got
back home and I haven’t been able to drink it, but I think I’ll have a
drink tonight with her. There better be whiskey in Heaven!!
Amanda,
I hope you know how much you impacted me this year. I love you, girl!
You’re such an amazing person and I can’t wait to see you again someday.
Love, Alexis
Much love to you and your family, it has to take some amazing people to make such an amazing girl.
I met Amanda about 7 months before my husband left for bootcamp on the NavyforMoms website. She was my go to girl, she seemed to always have the answers to all my questions. She was so helpful that I actually decided to move to the same apartment complex as her and Cody. Amanda helped me out more then I think she will ever know. Between giving me advise on my move to Illinois, telling me what lane to stay in while driving to bootcamp graduation to beat the most traffic and making Cody wake up at 6am on his days off to have him sign out my husband so I could spend the day with him Amanda was always there for me from the very beginning of our friendship.
Throughout our time together in Illinois we bought our brother and sister kittens Rowley and Kona together,went shopping, spent everyday during the summer at the pool or 6 flags ate dinner together at least 3 days a week,and went on hour long car rides to places Amanda just wanted to check out she was such and adventurer.
Even though Amanda and I followed our husbands to different duty stations we still stayed in contact with each other. Amanda touched my heart and inspired me in ways I can't even express. She was always there for me, and even though we were both in the same situation living away from family in a strange state Amanda always made the best out of the situation and made it a point to make me feel at home with her and Cody. I love you Amanda and I am so grateful that I had you as a friend even if it was only for a short time.
"I had only known Amanda a few months before my husband left on
his first deployment. She showed up on my doorstep the evening after
he left, with a bag full of chocolate and a hug. That's when I first
realized that I had found myself a real friend.
I woke up to a phone call from her one morning... "Hey, get
dressed! We are going to meet Justin Moore!" She picked me up in her
big ole hummer. We waited in a surprisingly short line to get
autographs and take pictures with Justin Moore. We quickly discovered
that he is way shorter in person than he appears in his music videos.
She always had something fun and exciting in mind to keep us busy.
Whether it was hanging out on my couch, going out to eat, or going to
a concert, Amanda knew how to keep my mind off deployment. I could
never thank her enough for that. But, I really hope she knew how much
it meant to me.
Wherever you are, Amanda, I hope you know how many people love you
and are missing you. You were truely beautiful inside and out."
-Leah Van Huyck
I will not be posting for the next few days as we prepare for Amanda's memorial service. I will resume my tribute to her life as soon as possible. It is my hope that others will be able to guest post and / or share their memories of Amanda. I would LOVE to feature those memories here.
If you have a memory of Amanda or tribute you'd like to share, please email me at jimdwarnock@gmail.com . I will copy and paste your email verbatim on this blog, so if you have typos or misspelled words, they will not be corrected. I want everything to be as real as your memories are.
Amanda Elizabeth (Warnock) Cross (1990-2012)
Age 22 of Buda, TX, went home to be with her beloved Saviour on Thursday March 29, 2012 after an extended hospitalization at the University of Washington Medical Center in Seattle, WA. Amanda succumbed to a lung infection after a noble lifelong battle with Cystic Fibrosis.
Amanda was born at Brackenridge Hospital in Austin, TX on February 18, 1990 and grew up in Kyle and Buda, TX. She is the daughter of James and Veronica Warnock of Buda, TX. She leaves behind her husband Cody Cross of Kyle, TX, whom she married at Ruby Ranch Lodge in Buda on July 26, 2009. Cody is in the U.S.Navy and stationed in Bremerton, WA. Please hold him up in your thoughts and prayers.
Amanda attended Tom Green Elementary, Wallace Middle School, Barton Middle School and graduated from Jack C. Hays High School with the class of 2008. She was a four year cadet in the JROTC program there. She was a wedding photographer and videographer and produced her first music video in 2011.
Amanda was a vivacious young woman with an adventurous spirit and a caring heart. Although she was very ill at times, she always put others first. She possesed a beautiful smile and touched everyone she met. Amanda loved animals and water activities and sunshine. Most people that knew Amanda found it hard to believe that she suffered an illness and Amanda never used her illness as a crutch, and refused to let it stop her from doing anything she wanted to do.
Amanda is survived by her sisters Rachel Nelson of Elgin, TX and Jessica Ebell of Kyle, TX as well as her parents and husband.
Memorial service will be held on Thursday April 5, 2012 at First Baptist Church of Buda, TX, 104 S. San Marcos St., Buda, TX 78610 (512) 295-2161 at 2:00 PM, with burial at Live Oak Cemetary on Twin Creeks Rd in Manchaca, TX. following the service.
Amanda died this morning shortly after 3 AM, as her beautiful mother cradled her head in her arms. She's in heaven today, doing all the things that CF kept her from doing. Glory be to God for such an amazing honor to have been her father, friend and brother in Christ. Though you're far away, we'll see you again someday. One of these days...
Today has been really hard. It's just about the end for Amanda. If God doesn't bring forth a miracle, Amanda will probably die tonight.
Where does one begin to express feelings so deep and so raw. Cystic Fibrosis is an evil disease from the very pit of hell and it is robbing me of one of my greatest treasures. I am sick to my stomach right now.
Amanda is not processing CO2 properly and will soon stop breathing. Putting her on a respirator will not save her once her lungs fail. Her health fell so fast. In one short month she went from around 60% lung capacity, which is good for a young woman with CF at her age, to almost nothing. What a waste of such a wonderful person.
I gave Amanda to God when she was a baby. Soon He'll come calling for her. I'd like to take her back, but that's not possible. It also looks like there's no miracle that will save her. It's amazing that we are in one of the alleged best places in the country for CF'ers and they are powerless to heal her. Ladies and gentlemen, doctors are men, not gods like many of them think they are. One day, they'll be in the same predicament as my sweet Amanda. Maybe then they will bow to the true God and give up their empty headed ideas of who they are. Until then, we are stuck with powerless technicians known as doctors. God holds all the real power.
My beautiful wife has been here for almost two weeks, fighting this battle to the point of shear exhaustion. The same for Amanda's husband Cody. He has been such a loving son in law and husband to my sweet girl. Oh my dear Lord, I feel so bad for him. I will always love him for who he is and how he loved our little girl. I will pray for him the rest of my life that he will find clarity through this and find love. Amanda would want that.
I know when Amanda dies that she will be with Jesus. The Bible promises that for believers. It gives me comfort to know that I will see her again. She'll be happy and free of any illness. What a promise we all have in Him. It still doesn't soften the blow right now.
I have had so many memories made by Amanda. I love all my girls so much, but this poor baby got short changed. I had hoped for a cure, hoped for many more years with her, playing cards and drinking beer while she drank the occasional shot of whiskey. She could always drink me under the table. She had an amazingly strong liver. Her heart was stronger than strong too. I really think her other organs were SUPER organs and made up for her weekend lungs. She was a pistol, right to the end. I don't think you can drink in heaven, but if you could, she would and be one of the best at.
This past summer, while Cody was deployed in the Persian Gulf, she came to stay with us. I wouldn't trade those days for all the gold in the world. Besides, gold is just pavement where she's going. The things that really matter whether here or there are relationships, and we had a great one. Amanda always told Veronica and me that next to her twin and her husband, we were her best friends. That's one hell of a complement. We shot weddings together, went camping the week school started and had two whole state parks completely to ourselves. Amanda reconnected with old friends from high school days and even shot her first solely self produced music video. She wanted to be a videographer and was planning on leaving after a few weeks to go to a video school in Seattle. I even co-signed the loan. I could never tell Amanda no. She found out the real cost of the school and decided it wasn't worth the cost and ended up staying with us until the first of December. I and everyone that knows her was happy that she stayed. Time with Amanda was always precious and that time, more than almost any. I'll miss one my best friends dearly.
When Amanda got back to Washington to set up their new townhouse for her and Cody, she did it in style. Texas style. That girl LOVED Texas and would defend her state against any foe. In Texas we have a saying, "Don't mess with Texas". I think it should have been, "Don't mess with Texas or Amanda will mess you up". Amanda created a beautiful home for Cody and her. She never really got to enjoy it.
In high school, Amanda was a marksman on the rifle team. Veronica would always travel with her on the ROTC trips to make sure Amanda was OK. Amanda would always out shoot everyone. Even while sick at times. Had she not had CF, she might have become a Marine. Oorah! We would also go to the Marine Corp Ball every year. It was a big night out for us.
Amanda was instrumental in providing me the encouragement I needed to start my own appliance repair service. She and Veronica talked me into it while playing Rummy and I'm glad she lived to see it come to fruition. Amanda loved rummy. She was great at it and usually won. Amanda loved to win. Why shouldn't she, she was a winner. She beat us all again. First one to heaven. That may have been her plan all along.
Amanda was great with animals. She used to ride her cows and pigs and tie dolls on a boar's back with a rope. The rest of us could hardly touch them. Amada could lay down and take a nap with them. When she was eleven, Veronica let her get a inside dog. Her name was Kandy, because she looked like cotton candy. She loves that dog and that dog loves her. I wonder how it will effect Kandy when Amanda leaves us.
There is so much more I'd love to share about Amanda. I am just hurting too bad right now to say anymore. I am going to include her music video here at the end, so you can see how talented she was. Amanda was an artist, photographer, videographer, daughter, wife, twin, best friend, and so much more. I wish those of you who never met her could have. You'd have been honored.
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