According to one of the on-line dictionaries, strength can be defined as... moral power, firmness, or courage. Amanda was a very strong person. Amanda had the ability to strengthen those around her. We've found, through losing her, who among those she left behind are really strong, like Amanda would have wanted them to be.
Amanda married, moved far from home, made a home for her and Cody, alone and sick, while her husband was deployed. That's strength coupled with courage and love. She WOULD NOT allow Cystic Fibrosis to stand in her way, and rarely even let people know she had CF. She hated enabling and refused to be enabled. Again, so strong.
Amanda would be very angry if her family, friends, loved ones stopped living and hid under a rock. It would hurt her to see us give up and not keep living. She would have wanted each of us to get up and go teach, or repair appliances, or go to school, or work at our jobs, or continue to book and shoot weddings. Amanda would want Cody to continue his Navy career. Amanda would want her brothers-in-law, who she loved deeply to continue their pursuits. She would have wanted her nieces and nephews to go on with their educations and to grow up to be productive adults. Strong people were her favorites. She didn't have much time for people who gave up. She fought until the very end.
To grieve the loss of a loved one and to cry is natural and not a sign of weakness. Giving up is. We are all grieving her death and missing her presence, but Amanda will kick our butts when we get to heaven if we wallow in our grief and give up. As hard as it can be at times, we need to be strong. Much of the strength we have, we have because of her. She left us this strength to be part of a lasting legacy in remembrance of her, and to show one minute of doubt and weakness would only serve to diminish that beautiful legacy.
Veronica and I were her mom and dad for 22 years. We knew her BETTER than any one. In her honor, we will use every ounce of strength that Amanda has given us over those 22 years, to continue to be the people she knew we are. Many of our friends have surrounded us with their love and care. They've wrapped us in their prayers, they've flooded us with their sincere condolences. As her closest friends, as her loving parents, her card playing, camping, wedding shooting, drinking buddies, it would be easy and even accepted by those friends for us to show weakness. Amanda would say, unequivocally... BULLSHIT! Were we to give up, I can almost hear her exact words - "Mom, Dad stop it! Get your heads out of your asses and BE STRONG!" We will choose to do just that!
If you were a friend or loved one of Amanda, please honor her memory by being strong. She gave you much of that strength.
Thank you Jim.
ReplyDeleteI remember Amanda from when she was a patient at the "old" Austin Children's Hospital, back when she was about 12 years old. She had such a fire and spunk that light up the room. She used to beat me at the board game "Clue" repeatedly. Her life is an inspiration to me too even though we didn't stay in touch. Her life is a testimony to true faith and unwavering morals. Yalls family always seemed very close. She accomplished her goals and showed us how to live and love. I am sorry she is gone, I am sorry for your loss, and I hope that her life can inspire the rest of us to never give up, no matter what.